October 13, 2008
Why on earth do we refer to how we relate intimately as
- Performance ?
I can think of a gazillion problems with this term. It’ like we’re putting on a show after which we expect to be scored. I do not want a man to perform for me, I want him to relate to me, love me and celebrate life with me. And, nothing shuts love down like the idea that they have to “perform” with the person who holds the keys to their heart.
While I’m at it, I also don’t like the word,
I’ve had my world rocked by people who I’ve never even met – it takes a pretty potent person to do that. Some of these people are/were female, but if I knew for certain that any of the men who have influenced me deeply were unable to obtain erections, I would still consider them to be incredibly potent.
It’s bad enough that we continually check each other out for how we do or don’t measure up out in the world. Why would we turn intimacy into a proving ground? That diminishes an expression of the heart into an expression of ego and power, and undermines the very purpose of intimate relations.